Phone Dating – Yes or No?

Phone dating is common when people have discovered each other on line, but it is a complete waste of time! Let me explain why.

1. Many guys just don't have the courage to ask a girl out and keep the conversation going in the hope that she will suggest a meeting. It is something a guy can "hide behind".

2. People become addicted to Phone Dating. A beautiful woman related her experience to me: "He phoned me every night at 8 pm and we talked for three hours. When I made it clear that I would prefer a proper date rather than a 'Claytons Date' he lost interest. I really believe he was addicted to Phone Dating."

3. What you "hear" is not necessarily what you get! Phone Dating is most common before a couple have met. They are at their most charming both wanting to impress. Sometimes a really exciting rapport is developed, each becomes a little cheeky, even daring over the telephone and then when they meet . . . They are not what each other imagined.

She is thinking, "Gosh! Did I really flirt with him?"

He thinks, "If I had known she has such a large 'but' I would never have been so daring. Now how do I get out of this one fast?"

Research has shown that 50% of all phone assessments are incorrect. Very large women most often have soft, sweet voices making them sound tiny whilst petite women have strong voices and sound large. Men with toffy voices quite often don't have the funds to live the elite lifestyle that their voice reflects. Some men with very flat voices are very well educated.

We hear of people who are oceans away who meet on-line and develop very personal relationships. This relationship may continue for months, even years without meeting. When they do meet, most often the relationship fizzles out because each has been talking to a figment of their own imagination.

The actual person they meet is not the person that they feel they have been talking to all this time. It comes as a shock and most couples never recover from the shock. Of course we have all heard of couples who have met their husband or wife on-line after a long phone courtship but these are the ones we hear about because they are so rare.

So, what are the alternatives?
At Entre Nous Introduction Agency, we encourage our clients to be brief on the phone to develop a rapport after you have met.

We suggest you meet for a coffee and plan an activity for a second meeting. Develop a friendship first before you date. Give yourself time with a new person before you decide whether this person is suitable to date.

Rather than phone dating or blind dates we recommend that you get to know a person by developing a friendship. You will soon discover whether this person has similar values and whether they have the characteristics to be able to fulfil your long term relationship needs.

After you are quite sure that your prospective partner has all the attributes necessary to be able to develop a lasting relationship, then begin dating. You could never discover all this whilst telephone dating. In fact many people who have taken the phone dating option say that some are not always truthful on the telephone.

In the safety of their own home they are tempted to project their espoused values rather than their actual values.
Whilst phone dating you can expect to meet people who are lazy - can't be bothered getting out there and meeting people; people who have a created image of themselves which is nothing like the real person; people who are grossly overweight – whose only exercise is to walk to the refrigerator and back and yes, I hate to say it, married people – who are seeking an escape from a dreary life.

Instead of putting some effort into their lives they escape to the imaginary world of phone dating.

In summary, phone dating is only suitable for the misfits of this world.

To find out your personality type: click here
To find out "Are you ready for a relationship?": click here
Books by Rosalind Baker (nee Neville) Dial A Woman, Dial A Man & Dial A Personality: See our books
Questions: See our FAQ

Keywords: singles, phone dating, single women, single men, dating, introductions

For more information, please contact:

Rosalind Baker (nee Neville), Principal
Telephone: (03) 9669 6000 or 0402 017 243
Email: rb@entrenous.com.au

Books by Rosalind Baker (nee Neville):
Dial A Woman, Dial A Man & Dial A Personality

Questions: Frequenty Asked Questions