Divorced Guys - #2 How to avoid baggage creeping into exciting new dating

Part 2 of 7 Series

How to avoid baggage creeping into exciting new dating: Keep your 'ex' in a compartment that is never aired in the company of other women. If you dare to complain about a woman (even if it is your 'ex'), you will antagonize the one you are trying to woo. Women believe that all women are sisters-under-the-skin. If you complain about a woman, you are the enemy. If you complain about your mother or your children you are a monster. If you complain about your marriage, you are not only a monster but it reveals what a poor marriage partner you were.

Many divorced men want to talk about these things, it's only natural; just don't make the mistake of treating a date like a therapist. Find yourself a therapist and get it all out of your system before you start dating. If you can't get it all out, at least compartmentalise it and keep it for the therapist.

This is more important than you probably realise. If your 'ex' is not compartmentalised she will still be controlling your life, your thoughts, your conversation - and the result? She will be causing you to screw up instead of moving forward.

Compartmentalise your children too. You were used to talking about the children every night with your 'ex', however you will find other women will go cross-eyed on the second time you mention them. Keep them in a compartment that is separate from dating altogether.

Being single is very different from being married. Single women are not interested in your children because they did not give birth to them. She won't be interested in them until she falls head over heels in love with you. All she wants to know is that you have a healthy/happy relationship with them. Any signs of interest she gives before that is usually to be polite. But I can just hear her now as she relates her date with you. "He was such a bore, his entire range of topics was about his children."

If you are a workaholic and your life is mainly about work you have better compartmentalise that too. She won't want to hear too much about work either.

Dating Tips for Divorced Guys. The Complete Series is available at www.entrenous.com.au/media and www.articlesbase.com and includes:

1 If you find yourself at a loss for words on dates
2 How to avoid baggage creeping into exciting new dating
3 Seduction Can Be Easy
4 Clothes Maketh the Man
5 Beware! Don't leave yourself open to be tricked, fooled or conned
6 Remember the manners you used when you were just out of high school
7 Don't rush into the next relationship

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Keywords: Dating, introductions, single women

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Books by Rosalind Baker (nee Neville):
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